A FAMILY "STRENGTH" TEST
All families have strengths to one degree or another.
The more strengths a family has, the more “protection” it has to help families grow, parents mature, and children blossom.
With your family, take the following test to see where your family ranks... more importantly perhaps, to see where there are opportunities for change and growth.
This is not a scientific survey, but gives a general indication about the strength of your family, and gives some general indications of areas for improvement for a higher and more satisfying quality of life for the family.
FAMILY STRENGTH INDICATORS:
1. We often talk about our feelings.
2. We only argue occasionally (less than once per week.)
3. I know what's important to our family.
4. For me our family is fulfilling.
5. When we argue we do not use profanity, swear, or insult each other.
6. We have enough money for the important things.
7. Work is important, but family is our top priority.
8. I (we) feel good about our roles as parents.
9. For married couples - Our relationship is strong.
10. Occasionally someone gets mad at someone else, but usually “unresolved” tension
in our house is rare.
11. The kids are doing well in school.
12. Everyone in the family have obligations, and do them without being constantly nagged.
13. We eat together as a family almost every day.
14. We look forward to spending time with each other.
15. There is little or no drinking, drugging or gambling in our family.
16. We live within our means, or avoid expensive non-essential purchases.
17. There is a lot of laughter in our family.
18. We try to live consistent with our understanding of God’s will for us.
19. Our family doesn’t do mean or spiteful things.
20. Saying “I’m sorry” and forgiveness are rules we all abide by - even if not immediately.
21. We try to help with the interests, comfort and happiness of each other.
22. We understand and show respect to each other even when there are differences.
23. We all try to put the interests of our family above self interests.
24. Family members understand the need for appreciation, compliments, comforting,
encouragement, listening, and giving love and affection.
25. “Bad attitudes” are few and far between.
26. It’s easy to think of good traits for our family members.
27. Family members are responsible and offer to help and follow-through.
28. Even though we have experienced stress like poverty, illness, failure, disappointment,
or even death in the family - we still have family peace.
29. We tend to say “I love you” often, and give lots of hugs.
30. Vacations together usually turn out well.
31. Our family members can adapt when under stress.
32. My spouse is loyal and affectionate.
33. We are close to our relatives and extended family.
34. Our family strives to be supportive to each other, and we see ourselves as a “team”.
35. There is a lot of kindness in our family.
36. We spend time together doing family oriented activities.
37. I am proud of our family.
38. We practice our family religion together, as a family.
SCORING:
A score of 25 - and above for “Yes” answers:
Congratulations! Your family has good skills and attitudes, which help you handle life's stresses.
This makes your home life rich and satisfying.
A score of 15 -25:
You have a strong start. Try consciously practicing more of your good skills and positive attitudes in order to create even more harmony at home.
A score of 10 - 14::
You're probably under many stresses. Look carefully at these questions and think about ways to improve your score. More family time may be beneficial.
A score of 0-9:
All families have highs and lows, positive sand negatives. Families are a work in progress. But if your family has not achieved the quality of life you expect by now, taking action now is very important for your family's health and happiness. Family Counseling may be very beneficial.
1. We often talk about our feelings.
2. We only argue occasionally (less than once per week.)
3. I know what's important to our family.
4. For me our family is fulfilling.
5. When we argue we do not use profanity, swear, or insult each other.
6. We have enough money for the important things.
7. Work is important, but family is our top priority.
8. I (we) feel good about our roles as parents.
9. For married couples - Our relationship is strong.
10. Occasionally someone gets mad at someone else, but usually “unresolved” tension
in our house is rare.
11. The kids are doing well in school.
12. Everyone in the family have obligations, and do them without being constantly nagged.
13. We eat together as a family almost every day.
14. We look forward to spending time with each other.
15. There is little or no drinking, drugging or gambling in our family.
16. We live within our means, or avoid expensive non-essential purchases.
17. There is a lot of laughter in our family.
18. We try to live consistent with our understanding of God’s will for us.
19. Our family doesn’t do mean or spiteful things.
20. Saying “I’m sorry” and forgiveness are rules we all abide by - even if not immediately.
21. We try to help with the interests, comfort and happiness of each other.
22. We understand and show respect to each other even when there are differences.
23. We all try to put the interests of our family above self interests.
24. Family members understand the need for appreciation, compliments, comforting,
encouragement, listening, and giving love and affection.
25. “Bad attitudes” are few and far between.
26. It’s easy to think of good traits for our family members.
27. Family members are responsible and offer to help and follow-through.
28. Even though we have experienced stress like poverty, illness, failure, disappointment,
or even death in the family - we still have family peace.
29. We tend to say “I love you” often, and give lots of hugs.
30. Vacations together usually turn out well.
31. Our family members can adapt when under stress.
32. My spouse is loyal and affectionate.
33. We are close to our relatives and extended family.
34. Our family strives to be supportive to each other, and we see ourselves as a “team”.
35. There is a lot of kindness in our family.
36. We spend time together doing family oriented activities.
37. I am proud of our family.
38. We practice our family religion together, as a family.
SCORING:
A score of 25 - and above for “Yes” answers:
Congratulations! Your family has good skills and attitudes, which help you handle life's stresses.
This makes your home life rich and satisfying.
A score of 15 -25:
You have a strong start. Try consciously practicing more of your good skills and positive attitudes in order to create even more harmony at home.
A score of 10 - 14::
You're probably under many stresses. Look carefully at these questions and think about ways to improve your score. More family time may be beneficial.
A score of 0-9:
All families have highs and lows, positive sand negatives. Families are a work in progress. But if your family has not achieved the quality of life you expect by now, taking action now is very important for your family's health and happiness. Family Counseling may be very beneficial.
